Him
by Memories-of-nothing
Summary: Sakura is in love with Naruto but after he marries Hinata there isn't much room for her to be by his side anymore... This story is about love, disception and friendship.. Orinally was supposed to be 3 parts but this story just kept on growing so I'm not sure how many chapters more I will add.. please enjoy
1. Chapter 1 - Hopeless Wonderer

Disclaimer! I do not own anything that has to do with NARUTO!

HIM

Lately I wonder how I started having feelings towards him. When did I start to see him as something more than just a dear friend. I don't understand my feelings and can't seem to grasp the gravity of this situation. I think if there was an award for having awful timing the winner will be me. First I dedicated most of my life chasing a man that never showed any interest in me to begin with and now after all the tears, laughs and troubles I have come to realize that deep within my heart I've always had feelings for my best friend in the world. I still can't seem to pinpoint when I started seeing him differently? Was it after war? Or perhaps before that? Or was it when I saw that his feelings for me had changed from having a crush to a platonic friendship.

So what had changed? Before I started feeling like this having him think of me as nothing more than a friend would have been a welcomed changed from all the times he had asked me out as children. So what do I do now? Do I act out on my feelings or do I smile and congratulate him for finally asking the most beautiful girl in the village out? What would he say if I tell him of my feelings for him? Would he be happy or would he reject me? I have always been a selfish person so perhaps it is time to change the course of my life and instead of chasing another dream then maybe I will let him have the happiness that he has always dreamed as a child.

Lately I wonder how his body would feel against mine. I know I shouldn't think about stuff like that specially as I see him walking down the street hand in hand with his beautiful girlfriend, another good friend of mine. Guilt starts piercing through my chest as feelings as jealousy callously start taking over my heart and in that moment I know that I need to get away from this place that no longer holds anything for me but misery and memories of a love that will never bloom.

As I start unpacking my stuff from a previews mission, I hear my doorbell ring and as I open the door I see him there outside my door with a big smile and those beautiful blue eyes that pierce my heart. "Hey, what are you doing here?" I ask him as I try to give him a fake smile, which he notices and frowns "Are you ok? Lately it seems like everytime I try to talk or see you it's not a good time" I nod my head and take a deep breath "Don't be silly have been very busy with the hospital and helping the Hokage with certain missions. Is there something you wanted to talk about?" I say as I look down. He shakes his head and lifts my chin "Really? I could have sworn you were avoiding me" my eyes widen at his statement and quickly I laugh nervously and shake my head "come on, why on earth would i do that? You are after all my friend" I say that with a smile and continue talking " and I would have assume you were busy with Hinata, taking her out and stuff… she must feel pretty special to finally have you all to herself" He laughs at that "She is wonderful, it's like my heart its finally happy to have such an amazing woman with me" I look down "yeah I bet she feels pretty lucky herself to have someone like you light up her world everyday."

He looks at me and then smiles after hearing my words and for a while all we do is stare at eachother my heart starts beating a little louder with each second that passes and we start walking towards each other without breaking eye contact, everything around us disappears and all you can hear is the beating of our hearts. He suddenly moves my hair out of my face and I say "Is there something you needed to talk about? Why are you here?" I whisper the last part and don't know if he actually heard what I said "I wanted to talk to you about us, it seems like for the last 7 months or so we have not had time to talk to each other and every time I am around whether it's alone or with Hinata you always seem to find excuses to leave the room, so please tell me if I did something to make you upset" as I hear this, I turn away from him and try distancing myself from him "There is nothing going on, you didn't do anything I've been very busy that's all, I promise" as soon as I say that his facial expretion changes from worry to anger "You know, I never thought that you would lie to me? You can't even look me in the eye and tell me that you are ok, so please spare me the nonsensical excuses and tell me the truth, what is bothering you?"

My mind is going crazy trying to find the right words to convey my feelings of me being ok, but what's the point in the end nobody knows me like he does, so why lie perhaps telling truth will liberate me from this ongoing nightmare of not being able to be with him, As soon as that thought crosses my mind an image of Hinata and Him being happy crosses my mind and my will falters. "I'm ok, I'm just trying to figure out something and I'm trying to find the best approach for it… Please don't worry this has.." he interrupts "please don't tell me it has nothing to do with me, everything that involves you has everything to do with me, you are my family Sakura you can't just push me away" " don't tell me what I can or cannot do alright, I haven't been your business for a very long time so why are you being so annoying and trying to meddle in mine" I yell at him "Sakura, don't give me that shit, we have known eachother for a very long time and this" Pointing at me and him "..is not something new, I know something is bothering you, so until you tell me what it is, I refuse to" I kiss him, I don't know what came over me but right now all I care about is this kiss, his touch, his softness. As we pull away, eyes still close I whisper words that I never thought I would ever express " I love you, Goddamnit I love you so much, so there! Now you know what has been bothering me" As soon as I say those words he reaches back and kisses me again but this time this kiss is anything but innocent, it's full of passion, anger and confusion and without even noticing my back is hitting the wall of my living room and all I feel is hands touching me everywhere, his lips on my neck working his way down my skin. I have never experienced passion like this to feel wanted in such a way, it's primal and it feels so good to feel him, our clothes lay on the floor forgotten, his fingers tease my skin and I can't help but to moan as I feel him slide a finger inside my core, he teases me like this for couple of more minutes and just when he positions himself at the center of my core he stops, his eyes are wide with confusion and anger at the same time, he backs away from me and quickly dresses and leaves without saying anything to me. Tears blurred my vision and for the first time in my life I feel disgusted with myself.

The following day I tried my best to avoid him and everyone else, I said I love you but he never said it back, I guess his answer was him leaving me the way he did. I feel so stupid, how could I confuse him the way I did, God I'm such an ass I can't believe I did that. I need to get away from here and I need to get away now before I fall to pieces. Later on the day we all jonin are summoned by the Hokage's office for a meeting "Ok everyone, I need a volunteer for a mission. Since the war many small villages that lack monetary assurance need help with medical and reconstruction, this mission will require 1 person for either of those fields" Everyone stayed silent, finally some good news, this was the perfect opportunity for me to get away from here "I'll do it" everyone turns to look at me and I feel him looking at me with those penetrating blue eyes that look right through my soul "But I have condition, once I am done with that village I would like to travel and help other villages like that " "In other words you want to be free to travel so if you don't come back right away then you won't be listed as a missing ninja" the Hokage answers and I nod my head in approval "Sakura, are you sure about this? This isn't going to be easy" I smile at her worried tone, she has always been like a mother to me so it doesn't surprise me that she is trying to keep me close "I'm positive, plus you need the best here and you have Ino to assist you, I think my abilities will be best served in other places were they really need it" she looks at one more time and finally nods in agreement "Alright, you have 2 hours to pack, after that come to my office and get the information about the village that needs you now, you may be excused from the rest of the meeting" as I stand up and feel everyone looking at me, I turn and look at Ino and whisper good luck, I turn left and look at him and whisper I'm sorry with sad smile.

As soon as I open the doors I feel like a great weight has been listed off my shoulders, I take a deep breath and close my eyes, perhaps now with the distance I will be able to move on and live the rest of my life in peace without ever thinking about him, my best friend, the love of my life, Naruto Uzumaki.


	2. Chapter 2 - No Flame Burns Forever

So I was listening to Mumford and Son's and got inspired! I hope you guys like it!

 **Chapter 2:** **No Flame Burns Forever**

Lately I wonder how I manage to make it back to this place. Perhaps I lack conviction, then again I was never really able to deny him anything.

So here I am finishing what's left of my whiskey and surrounded by people who keep congratulating the happy couple, perhaps I should do the same and then exuse myself and leave this place.

Its funny how after two years of practically running away from my feelings I end up coming back here to be a witness of his happiness with another woman, well not just another woman but one of the sweetest people I have ever know.

I look around the dancing hall and spot a couple of familiar faces, Ino for example looks happy dancing with Sai, I'm so glad that they were able to find happiness with each other, there's also Temari and Shikamaru, I even see Lee dancing with Tenten. Everyone seems to have finally found someone where they can go home too, unlike me.

You would imagen that after 2 years after leaving the village that I would have been able to move on and in some ways I guess I did, time made me stronger or as strong as I will be able to be when it comes to him.

I still remember the way his lips felt against my skin, the softness of his touch, the way he made my body obey any command he demanded...oh God what am I doing.. I need to stop this.. he is gone.. forever out of my reach, all that is left is just the memory of his kiss and even that is now consider a sin.

I finish whatever is left from my drink and start walking towards the balcony, there's a small welcoming brease that soothes my skin, I take a deep breath and start thinking about my itinerary for tomorrow, there's many things I need done before I leave the village again.

"You know, I really didn't think I would see you here today" my thoughts are interrupted by Tsunade. "I wasn't planning on coming back but, Ino can be quite persuasive when she wants to be" I smile as I say this "how long are you staying for?" Still gazing at the scenery I front of me I answer "not long, I only came for the wedding. I'll probably leave the day after tomorrow, if not sooner" I turn and look at Tsunade giving me a sympathetic look "how long have you felt this way?" I smile "longer than I care to share, my lady"

She laughs at my answer and offers me some sake "a toast for broken dreams then" I shake my head and take a sip "to broken dreams indeed" after a while she asks "what exactly did Ino say to you to make you come back for this? I've tried to have you come back to the village for the past 2 years and you simply refused?" I take a deep breath and exhale before looking at her with a sad smile "she just made me confront and say out loud what I didn't want anyone to know and she told me a couple of truths I didn't want to hear either"

 _Flashback_

I was living in the outskirts of a small village near Suna, the people were impoverished but they still had the will to carry on and it found it liberating to be surrounded by people like them. Today, I was trying to relax from playing with the orphan children from the village, some of them were so charismatic and smart, I couldn't seem to keep up.

"Sakura?" As soon as I hear my name I turn and with a big smile I see one of my favorite blondes "Ino! What are you doing here?" I say to her after giving her a big hug "I was delivering a message to the Kazekage, and decided to pass through here, I didn't know you were staying so close to Gaara and his siblings?" I laugh at this "Gaara knows I'm here, I'm not sure about the other two though" and just like that we started catching up and reminiscing about the good old days.

"Did you hear the big news?" "What? You're finally admitting I'm better than you?" I teased her and she glares at me "Never forehead! And I'm talking about Naruto and Hinata, they're getting married!" Suddenly I feel like the blood is being drained from my body and become numb, did I hear her right? Why? Why him? Why her? I feel so stupid, I guess even now I felt a tinge of hope that he will come to me and tell me he loves me

"Sakura!" My thoughts are interrupted and I look at Ino who looks pretty confused by my reaction "I'm fine, I'm sorry... it's just... wow, I cant believe it" my voice crack and I trie to smile "Sakura why are you crying" she asks in a worried tone "out of happiness, he finally achieved one of his dream, of having a family" "Forehead, I have known you all my life and I know when you're full of it, what's wrong? And don't give me that crap that you are ok" I look into her eyes and can't stop myself from crying "I'm in love with him, the last night was in the village, I kissed him" Ino looks pretty shock by the news "pig, I'm so in love with him and after a year and a half, I can't seem to move on" I say to her.

"Is that why you left the village?" She asks and I simply nod my head in response "dammit forehead, why didn't you stay and fight for him? After you left Naruto was very upset, no one could even mention your name without him looking like someone took his heart out and ate it in front of him. Even Hinata was worried that he would end up hurting himself. But she was there and she helped him move on, and now as his friend and family like he considers you" taking a deep breath "you need to be there for him now. He was there when you begged him to bring Sasuke back, he was there when he died and comforted you. He was there for you when you needed someone the most... and even though you feel the way you are feeling now, it's time for you to be there for him"

I look at the ground and register everything that Ino is telling me and she is right, Naruto has been there for me in moments of need like when my parents passed away, and after Sasuke died. So now it was my turn to be there for him and be the friend that he deserves "you're right, I do need to be there for him. Whatever I feel now, it will eventually pass and it will become nothing more than a beautiful dream" I turn and smile at her "when did you get so smart pig?" "I don't know, but I'm glad I was able to help... will you ever come back to the village?" I smile and look at the children playing around "I don't know, perhaps one day"

 _End of Flashback_

"Ah, does he even know that you are here?" She asked even though she knew the answer to that question "not yet, I'm actually going to go there and offer my congratulations to them now, and then I'm going to go back home and pack, I think I might end up leaving sooner than I had anticipated" Tsunade only smiles at that "good luck and if you need company, you know where to find me" I smile back and whisper thanks to her.

As I walk inside the hall, I spot Kiba at the bar drinking, he looks as happy as I do. Perhaps he is also in love with Hinata or Naruto who knows, but I can't seem but to feel sympathetic towards him. I exhale loudly and make my way over to the newlyweds, they are currently talking to Hinata's father. As I get closer, my hands start to sweat and I'm feeling more nervous than I have ever felt in my entire life.

The closer I get the louder I hear his voice, he is laughing at something. I'm only steps away him, I raise my hand and pat his back. As he turns he looks at me with surprise, I give him a small smile and hug him quickly saying congratulations, he doesn't say anything, he only stares. He is still in shock that I'm actually there. I let him go and I quickly hug Hinata "you make a beautiful bride Hinata!" I say with a smile, she gracefully smiles back and replies "Sakura, I'm so happy you were able to make it! Right Naruto?" He only nods, unable to form the right words "how long are you staying for?" Hinata asks, I smile and give her another quick hug "I'm leaving tomorrow, I only came for the wedding. I'm very happy for the two of you, I really hope your marriage will be full of love and happiness" "I wont detain you any longer, I just wanted to congratulate you two" as soon as I say that I turn and hug both of them again and start walking away.

Naruto didn't say anything, I guess he really didn't expect me to be there. But not matter, from this point on, i need to put to rest whatever feelings I have for him. I cant do this anymore, I deserve to move on and find happiness as well. I look at my watch and see that it's 1 in the morning, I guess now will be a good time to leave. I turn to look at the happy couple one more time and see that Naruto is looking right at me, all I do is smile and wave goodbye.

As I start walking out of the building, I feel my tears stream down my face and I feel my heart ache with every step I take away from that building as I make my way back home.

One thing is for certain, I love him and whether i like it or not, I will probably love him for the rest of my life.


	3. Chapter 3 - Undisclosed Desires

**Chapter 3:** **Undisclosed Desires**

Lately I wonder how I got myself into this mess. It all started with a knock at my door and now that I think about it, I guess it was leading towards this. I stare at the back of my lover and think of the future we could have. Maybe we will have breakfast like normal couples do or perhaps go out for brunch. Its been 3 months since all of this started and I'm just getting restless about hiding my feelings for him. I run my hand up and down his back, he stirs and turns to face me. I give him a quick peck and close my eyes trying not to think about tomorrow and just live in this moment.

 _Flashback_

I had finally managed to go to bed after crying my heart out for the second night in a row when suddenly a knock on the door wakes me up. Instinctively i reach for the kunai knife hidden under my pillow, and start making my way towards my living room. I stop on my tracks and glance at the clock on my DVR player and see that it's actually 5 in the morning. Who the hell is outside my door at this damn hour, I think to myself. Again I hear a knock and start walking towards my door and by now i'm very annoyed.

"What the hell.." I'm suddenly cut off by Naruto entering my apartment. "Naruto what are you doing here?" I asked, annoyed because of the time and also because I really didn't want to see him, we stood there for a couple of minutes in silence and I feel his eyes analyzing me from head to toe.

"Are you really here? Or is this some type of cruel joke?" By now I just look at him in Confused "Are you drunk? Listen I think you should leave, your wife must be waiting for you worried sick" I tell him, hoping he will take a hint and would leave. He does the opposite, he starts walking towards me like a hungry animal ready to feast on his prey, he stops right in front of me, I can feel his breath caress my skin. I close my eyes and try to relish this proximity. "This is the spot were you first kiss and told me you loved me" by the time he is done talking, I just open my eyes and look at him and whisper "yes it is... why are you here"

He smiles a little "you asked me that too" "Naruto, please go back to your wife" I beg him and start backing further away from him, he only follows "it was out of convenience" I look at him a little confuse "what was out of convenience?" Instead of answering he just keeps walking towards me, as I keep backing away. I'm not sure at what point my back hits the wall of my apartment but noticing this he takes full advantage making the wall and his body my prison.

He lifts his hand and touches my face gently and whispers "did you mean it? When you said you loved me?" I look down and answer "that doesn't matter anymore, please leave" "no, I need to hear it, please Sakura i think you owe me that much after not reaching out for 2 years" still looking down, I answer "I do, I love you so much... but you know what's the worst part?" He shakes his head no "that I will never be able to have a normal life with you, fighting over petty things like who's turn is it to use the remote control, deciding whether we should go out to ramen or not, or waking up next to you every morning. All those things now belong to another woman that I will never be able to measure against. Hinata is everything I am not, she graceful, beautiful and has a wonderful soul and now she has you"

"You had me too Sakura, you had my heart for many years but you never said or even acknowledged me until 2 years ago, and then you drop the bomb that you love me and iyou disappear afterwards" he runs a hand through his hair, I only stare at him wanting to touch him, touch his hair and lips. "After you volunteered for that mission, I kept nagging granny Tsunade to tell me where you were, I even went into sage mode to make sure you were alright. Sakura it got so bad that Hinata asked me what was wrong, and I told her the truth. I told her the reason you had left and that even though I was so happy with her, deep within my heart I wanted to be with you more. I still loved you and wanted you back" he takes a deep breath and looks me in eyes "we broke up after that, but remained friends. She even started dating Kiba, she was finally happy too, she was not anyone's second choice"

I gasp at what I was hearing and tears start running down my face "then why Naruto?!" "Why did you marry her instead of coming to me?!" I yell at him and shove him aside "you said you used sage mode to make sure I was ok , but you never once wrote me or even came looking for me!" I cried in frustration, he reaches out and hugs me from behind "Sakura, I wanted to go but things got even more complicated. The council decided that I will be the next hokage and for that I had to stay and study and not long after I was notified that as hokage I needed to have a wife. At the beginning I refused and even granny Tsunade supported me in my notion but it was futile. That's when she started sending you orders to come back but you never did."

After hearing the last part my heart beat starts accelerating, I remember that lady Tsunade did indeed contact me but because of my duties I decided to stay and not come back, at least until I saw Ino that is. "So why Hinata, if she was happily dating Kiba... why her?" He exhales loudly and his breath tickles the back of my neck "the council had predetermined a list of available women that I could marry that would have a kekkei genkai. Since I had history with Hinata she was the most logical choice and they chose her... Hinata didn't want his either Sakura... sure she had loved me and I for a while returned her feelings as well. However when we broke up we realized that we loved other people more. When the council proposed the deal to Hinata's father, he accepted and told Hinata she will loose her rights as head of the family if she didn't agree with the proposal"

"Was I in that list?" I don't know why I said that, but I was curious to see what they actually thought of me, the council that it. I turned around and looked at Naruto, he shook his head no. Of course they didn't think of me.. why would they "you don't have a kekkei genkai, so they never mentioned you. They had Ino in that list but I refused because of her relationship with Sai... plus she is scary as hell" I smile at the last comment Ino pig did have mean hook when you pissed her off "so what now Naruto? You're still married and Hinata loved you once, I'm sure she would want to start over with you again" he doesn't say anything after my statement and his silence makes me uneasy. Perhaps Hinata told him the same and he had agreed, this is getting out of control.

"Narut..." he kisses me. This kiss brings flashbacks of the first time, its as hungry as the second kiss we had shared that fateful night. I try breaking the kiss, he doesn't let me and just continues "Naruto..." his lips start going down my neck "stop... please" he doesn't he continues his assault to my neck and by now he is running his hand down my breasts, I try to shove him away but he just pins my arms above my head, I didn't even notice my back hitting the wall again, he looks at me and lowers his lips to my ear and whispers "I love you, so damn much" before he starts nibbling my ear. After hearing those words all rational thoughts leave me and I let him be my undoing.

 _End of Flashback_

I must have fallen asleep because all I feel is lips caressing my body waking me up. I smile a little because I know exactly who it is, and I can't wait to see his face. I soon as I open my eyes, I see he is waiting for me to say something, but instead I close the gap between us and kiss him. "What time is it?" I ask.. he glances at the watch and whispers 3:30 in the morning. I kiss him again and and make him lay his head on my chest, and I feel happy. "Your heart is beating fast, Sakura" I don't answer, I simply run my hands through his crazy blonde hair. "I should go, before someone sees me coming out of your place" he looks at me with sad eyes as he tells me this, all I do is try to give him a small smile and a nod. He pulls away and starts getting dressed, and all I do is just look outside my window.

Its been 3 months since we started this affair, and deep in my heart I know I have his love, his soul, his heart and body. However in the eyes of the law and people around us I would be branded as nothing more than just The other woman that warms him up before he goes back to his real life and beautiful wife.


	4. Chapter 4 - Stay

**Hey guys, so this chapter is a bit explicit so you have been warned. Over all I hope you enjoy this :-)**

 **Chapter 4:** **Stay**

Lately i wonder how my life would have been if i had not come back to the village for Naruto's wedding. Would him and I end up the same we are now, tangled in bed, showing each other how we love each other or would I had found someone else to be happy with.

All thoughts seem to leave me as he makes his way down my neck, kissing me "Sakura …" he whispered, his breath was coming out choked and strangled. It felt so hot to feel his hands working on my skin, making me gasp and claw into it like my life depended on it. As a response he groaned as his thrusts were getting out of control. I could feel him in and out, thrusting in a forceful manner, it felt so good and all I could do is encourage his pace "Naruto... it's so good... keep going please don't ever stop..." I could see a smirk on his face as I encourage him to keep going, to make forget what we were doing was so wrong but it felt so good to have him in my arms.

I could hear him panting and clutching the sheets as he kept up with pace getting faster and harder. My head just fell backwards hitting the pillow below me, revealing my neck and him taking full advantage by sucking my skin and making moan even louder.

He clenches my hair, and drives even more deeply into my core, automatically I wrap my legs around his waist we both gasp because of the friction it creates. We were both getting close but neither is wants to submit so we keep this ongoing competition as to whom will last longer. I feel my body and mind going insane all I want is to cry out his name but instead I decided to confide my moans and see if he would rise up to this unspoken challenge.

He licks his lips as if he knows exactly what I want and in response he tilts my hips and starts stroking my already swollen nub with his thumb. Not expecting this I jerk a little and a choke escapes my lips as he again and again lunges into me making us forget the people that we were and only caring about what we were feeling now.

He leans down a bit and takes a nipple in his mouth and I feel him swirl his tongue around it and gives it a hard suck, I stroke his hair gently as a response keeping him there encouraging him to keep going. He looks up and looks me in the eye he lets go of breast and kisses my lips. This kiss is full of passion and lust. As we continue kissing I feel him moan in pleasure and cups up my bottom lifting me off the bed, and starts thrusting deeply and harder. We both climax at the same time, he falls on top of me and we laugh a little. I glance at the watch and it's 2 in the morning. I know exactly what is coming next, but there's the hope that he will stay.

He hugs me and kisses my forehead and whispers, three simple words that take my breath away "I love you" I smile and tell him that I love him too. He looks at the watch "I should go, it's getting late" I close my eyes and whisper "stay... why don't you stay tonight" he only looks at me. I already know what he's going to tell me but after 7 months of having this kind of relationship, I can't hide the fact that it's breaking my heart "I'm sorry Sakura, you know I would if I could but I need to go home and get my stuff ready for tomorrow's mission"

"home, I guess that's were you really belong" I tell him, I look out my window and start getting up looking for my nightgown. I can feel his eyes on me analyzing my every move. "I will get separated Sakura, just please be a little more patient... I cant just leave her like that" "then perhaps we should end this and you should stay with her, since you feel so bad" I don't even hear him move but my back is hitting the wall with both my arms above my head, I look him in the eyes and I see he is angry now "how can you say that, I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but I cant end things with Hinata like that... I know it's hard to understand but please be patient"

I look away as I feel tears start coming down my face "I understand Naruto but it's so damn hard to see you every day walking hand in hand with her, pretending to love her... and that's if you are even pretending" he closes the gap between us and kisses me. I simply kiss him back and let my feelings get the best of me "please don't be sad, when I come back from my mission, we will speak of this and settle this once and for all. I promise you" I look him and simply reply "ok, I will wait" I hug him and bury my face on his chest "I love you and please be careful, I don't want to see you too damage when you come back. I will probably be in the hospital to patch you up"

He smiles at me and and hugs me again "I love you and I will see you soon. I promise" and with that he leaves. I look outside my window and I see him looking right back at me, he waves and I wave him back. Somehow, I feel an uneasiness in my heart, perhaps its guilt or is it a premonition of a futuristic downfall. I'm not sure what is it but all I can do it now is just wait for his safe return and perhaps we will see whose heart will end up broken at the end of the line.


	5. Chapter 5 - Fade to Black

Hey guys,

I wanted to thank everyone reading my story out there! You guys are amazing thanks for sending private messages with suggestions or just letting me know you like the story! Thanks to everyone who is following and favoriting my story as well as those to sent comments. Love you all :-)

 **Chapter 5:** **Fade to Black**

Lately I wonder what I would do if Naruto decides to stay with me. I'm sure I will be more than happy but the consequences of that happening will be life altering. He would probably be denied being hokage, people will talk about us and not exactly in a good way. Our friends might shun us, ugh I don't even know why I'm thinking about this. I glance at the clock and see its 8:30, it's time for me to get ready and go to the hospital. Its been one week since Naruto left on his mission, he should be bound to come back any day now, and I cant wait to see him.

As I start walking out of my house, i see Kakashi waiting outside my apartment. "Kakashi, its been so long!" I hug him and give him a big smile, he hugs me back and holds me for a little while "Yo!... how's my favorite former student?" I only smile "I've been good, what about you?! I haven't seen you in years Sensei?" He pats my head "well I was in a mission, I came back a couple of days ago actually, but I have been resting. I was on my way to my apartment when I saw you through the window the other day" oh no, what if he saw Naruto coming out of my place, I give him a nervous smile and laugh a little "nonsense, when was this? That you saw me I mean" he only looks at me now, like he is trying to analyze me "about a week or so... you were waving at someone. But the funny thing is that on the same night I ran into Naruto, he looked like he was deep in thought" as I hear this, I can feel the color leave my face and become serious, he continues talking ".. so my little cherry blossom, has a boyfriend now? That's who you were waving right?" I try to not let his words get to me , but deep down I know he knows it was Naruto coming out of my place "well I wouldn't call him my boyfriend but yes I care about him, our relationship is a bit complicated if you know what I mean" he only shakes his head and reaches towards me and pulls me into a tight hug and whispers "be careful Sakura, he's married and if he tells you he will leave his wife, just know that until he does that, it's nothing but empty promises and I don't want to see you get hurt" I only look at him, I can't hide that it hurts what he is telling me but what's even worse is that I know he is right, I pull away from him and avoid eye contact "I'm sorry Kakashi, but I'm late... I have to go to the hospital... I'll see you around ok... rest, you still need to recover" he tells me something but I can't hear him, I just make my way to the hospital and try to ignore the pounding of my heart.

As the day progressed I found myself thinking about what Kakashi told me, I knew deep in my heart that he was right, but I had a chance to be with Naruto and I didn't want to give that up so easily. As I continue with my rounds at the hospital, I'm suddenly paged to go the entrance, as I make my way there I feel distracted, perhaps I should go home a little early today because lets face it my head is not really here, I think to myself.

"Sakura" I turn to look at the person who just called me, and I choke a little with the water I was just drinking as I'm face to face with Hinata and Ino. Both of them are looking at me weird and suddenly I feel exposed and I don't like it one bit. "Hey girls" i greet them, trying my best to seem normal. "Well, you look a bit spaced out" Ino tells and she reaches to hug me, I hug her back and turn to Hinata who is looking at me a bit weird "are you sure you are alright Sakura?" This time Hinata asks me that with concern in her voice and suddenly I feel disgusting for betraying my friend the way I did with Naruto. "I'm alright, Just a bit tired that's all.. but what about you guys? Were you the ones who paged me?" I ask and I see Ino smiling from ear to ear "pig, you can't just randomly page me to meet you unless its an emergency or something" I say to her annoyed, her smile only grows, she is about to say something but Hinata cuts her off "Actually I was the one who asked her to page you, I'm sorry I really hope I didn't interrupt anything" she tells me with a worried expression, I only shake my head and smile at her "don't worry Hinata, so why did you page me?" She smiles and starts dragging me and Ino outside "lets not talk here, I have something to tell you and I can't afford to let anyone hear me just yet" she says still smiling. I'm not sure why, but her smile makes me uncomfortable.

"So.. Naruto received wonderful news today?" Naruto was back and he didn't even stop by to say hello... "how long has Naruto been back? I though he might be gone for a couple of more days or so" Ino asked, Hinata just smiles and blushes a little "He got back this morning like around 4 or so, he was so sweet. He kissed me until he wake me up and gave me a gift he had purchase from the village he had been helping" at this point I'm not even listening anymore. He has been back since the early morning and up until now he hasn't even mention himself to me.. my heart starts beating really fast and I cant help but to feel angry and jealous of them and what they have. "... so today the Hokage came by the house and told Naruto he will be the next Hokage, he was so happy and excited this past month has had nothing but happiness for our growing family" this catches my attention, growing family? Oh god please don't do this to me "how far you?" I ask Hinata not even looking at her "4 months, I told Naruto before he left on his mission, he looked so happy.. we even made love before he left, kept assuring me how he was going to come back to me.. well" looking at her belly "to us.. I'm so happy and I wanted to share that with you, I told tenten already and she is excited too" I see Ino smiling and congratulating her and me I just stay there frozen on the chair Im sitting, I feel tears coming down of my face and I try my best to wipe them away, I go to Hinata's side and congratulate as well, she hugs me even tighter, we start pulling away but not before she says "Naruto! There you are!" She jumps and runs to him. All I do is stay there looking at him as he picks her up and kisses her and then he looks at me and for a second time I feel my life collapsing, everything around me starts getting blurry and all I see Naruto and Ino running towards me before I hit the ground and everything fades to black just like my dreams of ever having a family with him.


	6. Chapter 6 - Aftermath

**Chapter 6:** **Aftermath**

I open my eyes and feel the weight of my reality crushing me. I turn to my right and see the window, the moon is shining brightly and illuminates my room, I turn to my left and see Kakashi reading his book and Ino reading a magazine sitting side by side. I try getting up and that catches their attention "Sakura you have to rest especially in your condition, please just rest" Ino tells me quietly, I can sense she is really worried so I lay back down and ask "how long have I been out?" Kakashi answers this time "you have been out for 2 days, you had us really worried there Sakura" 2 days, oh great no wonder why my head feels so heavy "what happ..." I'm interrupted by someone coming inside my room, i look up and see it's Naruto, as he sees me awake he runs to my side and hugs me tightly and gives me tiny little kisses all over my face "you had us so worried Sakura, don't ever scare me like that... I thought ... I thought I lost you" I only look at him and start crying because the memories of 2 days ago hits me like a truck and I know what I must to finally be free of him.

We continue embracing when a loud cough makes us come back to reality. I turn and look at both Ino and Kakashi, both of them a bit shock, especially Ino. I only give both of them a sad smile and turn to Naruto and push him away a little. "Can you two give us a moment to talk in private please" I look at Ino and she shakes her head no "Ino... please, i will explain everything... I promise, but now I really need to talk to Naruto alone... please" Kakashi nods his head and waits for Ino to get up, once both of them leave Naruto kisses me, it's a very sweet and gentle kiss. I embrace him tighter and continue kissing, until we both need some air "Sakura you really scared me, you were out for 2 days... I didnt know what to do... I haven't moved from here... God, I love you so much, please don't ever scare me like that" I look at him and give him a small smile, he tries kissing me again but this time I stop him.

"Naruto... we need to end this, for good now" As soon as I say those words, tears start streaming down my face, I look up and see his hurt expression "Sakura, please you can't be seriously be asking me to end things... we are finally together and I'm so in love with you, so please stop" he looks me in eyes and I see his anger and frustration as he says those words to me, he continues talking "is this about me being married to Hinata... Sakura I'll divorce her tomorrow if you want... just please don't leave me, not again" he closes his eyes and I reach and caress his face. "Naruto, we have been together for 7 months and you haven't done anything... and" I choke a little "and now it's too late to end things with her" "Sakura! Pleas.." I shush him by placing my hand over his lips "I know about Hinata being pregnant... she told Ino and I the day I passed out..." he looks shocked by the news, and looks down shamefully, I lift his chin gently and say "I love you Naruto, and I guess in a way I understand why you never wanted to hurt Hinata, she is the sweetest person anyone can ever encounter and whether you want to admit it or not... you're going to be a father and I'm sure you will be a wonderful parent" he hugs me this time and starts crying along with me "I'm so sorry Sakura, when she told me, I felt divided... in a way I was happy to be a dad and at the same time I knew I would hurt you if I told you the news.. Can you forgive me" I smile at him "of course you idiot, I love you... but this relationship ends right now" he only hugs me tighter and starts kissing my neck "don't leave me Sakura, please" he whispers to my ear and I start crying even harder.

"how do you think I feel Naruto? I betrayed a good friend and now I'm loosing my best friend for my indiscretions... but I cant do this anymore Naruto, its breaking me and its breaking my heart and I cant.. " I tell him and this time I look him straight in the eyes, he seems to understand that this is the end of the two of us "and.. I don't want to see you anymore Naruto... it's going to be too hard for me to see around with them, so for now please... just stay away from me" when I say that, I see how hurt he is by my words but I can tell he understands my point, he gets up slowly and starts walking to the door "wait! Can you... can you give one last kiss... before you leave?" I ask him, my conviction failing me now and my weakness is taking a hold of me, he comes to my bed and he kisses me softly at first but then the kiss gets even more out of control, we both are expressing our frustrations and anger into it and as it comes to an end he looks me in eyes and says "I love you so much... and I will never stop loving you.. believe it" I start crying once more as he leaves my room, Kakashi and Ino walk inside and embrace me, I know they know what we have done, I know they are probably disappointed but at this moment all they do is confort and embrace me, and in a way it makes me feel a little better to have them by my side even though they know that I'm just the other woman in his life.


	7. Chapter 7 - Unintended

**Chapter 7:** **Unintended**

I feel the wind caressing my face as I sit on top of the Hokage face monuments. I'm not sure why, but sitting here makes me feel at ease even though my life is falling apart. Its been 2 months since that faithful day, my heart still aches to see him again, to feel his touch and his lips on me again. Thankfully, this time I have Kakashi and Ino who have been more than supporting towards my feelings. There are days like today when I want to see him more than anything, but I need to control my feelings and let him go for good.

"You know, you should be wearing your white robes today, its a very special day for your village" I know exactly who's voice that is and I turn and smile at him "indeed it is, I was thinking about random stuff... and what brings you here Lord Kazekage?" Gaara just smiles a little and sit down next to me "I wouldn't miss Naruto's special day" I smile too, he was right Naruto's dream was finally becoming a reality "I can't believe I have to call that idiot Lord Hokage now" I shake my head smiling a little. "How are you feeling Haruno? Not running away anymore" this time I turn to face him and he turns and looks back at me "when you told me back when you were at our neighboring village that you were going back to Konoha for Naruto's wedding, I though you were going to stop the wedding and finally tell him how you feel" I look away as soon as he says that, he only stares "that wouldn't have been fair for either Naruto and Hinata... and look at them now, she is giving him the family he always wanted and I just would have gotten in the way of his happiness" I feel his eyes on me, I feel naked talking to Gaara like this

"you know about a few months ago Naruto wrote to me asking me if he should leave his wife and how would that affect his nomination for Hokage if he did that.." I automatically turn to look at him as he continues talking "... he said he wasn't in love with Hinata and that now he was having an affair with the woman he has love his entire life and wanted to marry her instead, so I remember writing to him telling him in not so many words to end things with Hinata and then pursue a life with the woman he wanted to be with." I don't say anything, just felt the tears going down my face "you must think I'm a pretty horrible person now" I whisper to him, he only places a hand on top of mine "not at all, but I do think you need to start a new life away from this, away from guilt and away from him" he only takes a small pause and this time he looks at the view of Konoha "perhaps you can marry me and start a new life in Suna instead."

Gaara's words kept bugging me the rest of the day. Why on earth would he suggest something out of the blue like that. But what if I say yes, perhaps this can also be an opportunity for me to move on and find happiness as well. Ugh, I'm just going to try not to think about this anymore, I need to go home and get ready for the celebration.

Everyone in Konoha were gather outside the Hokage building waiting for our new Hokage to come out and greet us. I was standing with Ino, both us very excited to see Naruto come out dressed in his Hokage robes followed by a pregnant Hinata, both of them looked beautiful. From a distance I could see Gaara and the rest of the Kages, all of them looking proudly at Naruto. We all cheered for him and applauded. Finally the day he has been working since he was a child is here, I'm so proud of him.

"I cant believe that crazy knucklehead did it!" Ino said with tears on her eyes. "I know, I'm so proud of him, he has been working so hard for this since we were children. He deserves this and much more" I say with a smile on my face. I glance at Gaara and notice he was looking at the crowd and for a moment I thought he was looking at me "Gaara asked me to marry him, and I'm thinking about it" I tell Ino, she stops doing whatever is doing and looks at me shocked "what.. wait... but have you guys.. why?" I just giggle at her reaction. "After we rescued him from the Deidara, and I saved his brother we became good friends. He knows about me and Naruto and I think he wants to protect us both from hurting each other." I say to her still looking at Naruto. "Sakura, how do you feel about him? Do you even find him attractive to even consider marrying the guy?" I just continue looking at Naruto and respond "I don't know what I feel anymore. First I betrayed Hinata by sleeping with her husband, second I confused my best friend with my stupid feelings hurting him in the process. But even after all that, I think I deserve to be happy even if it's just a little... I don't know what to do, but one thing is for certain... I need to let go of Naruto for good now and never bring up my feelings for him ever again"

After the Naruto's celebration with the village, the rookie 9 planned a get together with Naruto before he starts his Hokage duties. I told Ino, it wouldn't be a good idea for me to show up, and of course being Ino, she used her persuasiveness to get me to agree. I was just walking around the market shopping for fruits, when I ran up Gaara talking with Naruto. I just looked at them and smiled at little "Lord Kazekage, Lord Hokage what brings you to this humble parts" both of them just look at me. Naruto seems to want to say something but Gaara beats him "Haruno how many times must I ask you to call me Gaara" I just smile in return "I'll stop calling Kazekage, when you stop calling Haruno and start calling me Sakura" he smiles at this and then cough breaks our eye contact and see Naruto looking at us confused "since when are you two so friendly with one another" "since she stayed taking care of the ill at Suna, plus Sakura and I have always been in good terms" I don't know why but I feel a little nervous to here with the two of them "Sakura... it's been a while.. how are you?" My stupid heart starts beating a little louder and faster when Naruto starts talking to me, I feel like teenager ugh! "I'm alright, just doing a little shopping and then I'm going to the little gathering Ino and Shikamaru planned for you... and that reminds me.. are you joining us tonight Gaara?" He shakes his head no "I was thinking about it but there are many things that need settling once you give me your answer." My eyes are wide and my brain can't seem to register if he is being sarcastic or not ".. well, ok.. I guess I will have an answer for you soon... I promise, now if you two gentleman excuse me. I must retire" I start walking away but not without over hearing both Naruto and Gaara "so what did you ask Sakura, she looked really nervous" Naruto asked curious, Gaara just looked at him and answered simply "oh, I just asked her to marry me."


	8. Chapter 8 - Ghosts That We Knew

Chapter 8 - Ghosts That We Knew

Lately I wonder as I'm sipping my drink why I let Ino talk me into doing things. Here I am, sitting in the middle of Ino and Kakashi avoiding eye contact with Naruto. I can feel his eyes on me from time to time and this is all Gaara's fault! How could he tell Naruto so nonchalantly that he asked me to marry him.

"Are you listening to me Sakura?!" Ino's voice brings me back to reality. "I'm sorry, I'm just a little tired. I think I'm going to go home soon, I have a meeting with Lady Tsunade tomorrow morning" she only shakes her head no "not before you tell me what are you going to do about Gaara's proposal" as a response my head only hits the table, at this point even Kakashi is staring at me weird "what proposal?" I only groan in response "Gaara asked her to marry him" Ino answers right away "wow that was very sudden, so what do you think you might do?" I only chug my drink and look at him before answering "I don't know, I mean it was very sudden but I know there's no feelings behind the proposal aside from him trying to help out a friend... so maybe I should say yes... ugh... I don't know" Ino only squeezes my hand and Kakashi pats my back. "Perhaps you should sleep on it and clear your head before making any rash decisions" Kakashi says as he takes sip of his drink.

"Kakashi is right Sakura... but do you mind telling me exactly why are you feeling anxious?" I only stare at her "Forehead I've known you all my life and I know there's something else bothering and you can't tell me it's not about Naruto because he looks like he is ready to punch a wall and can't seem to stop looking your way" after hearing this my head hits the table this time a little too hard "Its because of Gaara... I ran into them at the market and as I was leaving I over heard Gaara telling Naruto he asked me to marry him" at this point both Kakashi and Ino are looking at me stunned. ".. and no, I didn't stick around to hear the rest, so for now until I make my decision, I will be avoiding those two like a plague"

We all continued celebrating Naruto, telling old stories about him when we were genin. It was wonderful but I was a bit tired and decided to call it a night. I stood up and walked up to Naruto to hug him and congratulate him in the process. As I made my way towards him I felt his eyes on me and it made me a little nervous. "Hey, I'm calling it a night and wanted to say congrats on achieving your dream" I said with a smile on my face, he only looks at me and smiles back and hugs me tight and whispers "thank you for coming tonight" l just take a deep breath and feel him running his fingers through my hair. I start pulling away and just smile at him and start walking away and I hear him whisper "don't do it" I turn and just give him a sad smile and walk away from him not looking at back.

As I make my way to Ino, she only gives me a reassuring smile, and I take the drink from her and finished it in two gulps. "Hey that's mine Forehead!" Ino whines to me and I just laugh and start gathering my things. When I hear someone calling my name it seems to be lee, he only gesturing for me to follow him outside.. maybe something happened between Tenten and him and needs someone to talk to? I start making my way there when all of suddenly as soon as I step outside to the ally of the bar, I feel Lee put my arms above my head. I was about to knock him out when Lee's form disappear and instead Naruto's shape took place.

"Naruto, what the hell are you doing... I could have really hurt you... you moron" he doesn't say anything he just continues kissing my neck whispering little nothings on my ear. "... ahh.. stop... please...uhh..Naruto you're drunk and so am I, please we need to stop" he stops and only looks at me with those beautiful piercing eyes "you're mine" and with that he kisses my lips and I feel all doubts leave me and kiss him back with the same passion.

"I love you" he whispers as he bites my shoulder, I shudder in response. I pull his hair and continue kissing his neck, I feel him cup my bottom to lift me up. At this point I just let him do to me everything that he wants, I don't have the will nor do I want to stop him from showing how much he missed me. "Ask me anything Sakura, just please don't leave me" he says this as he undoes his pants and starts to pull my underwear out of the way to make his way inside of me, but I don't answer him I only continue to kiss him and enjoy his hands all over my body making me agonize in pleasure. As soon as he enters me we both groan because of the lack of proximity that we've had before and now that we finally joined all that's left is the pleasure of being reunited.

"Naruto!" I moan loudly as I feel him going in and out pounding me with such force that I I could do is throw my head back. "Not so loud Sakura" he hisses on my ear and then takes my earlobe and starts nibbling it. He stops for a moment and turns me around to face the wall and with hard struck he continues pounding my sensitive stop. "Sakura... ugh... you feel so good... you're mine... no one can touch you the way I can.." he pulls my hair as his member continues to thrust harder and deeper and even at times it feels a little painful. I'm almost there I can feel myself tightening around his member and hear him groan and continues fucking me harder and faster "Naruto... more... I'm so close baby... ahhh" "shh baby, ... you're so tight...ugh Sakura... Arc your back against me again.. oh baby.. yes just like that" as I back against him I hear him growl behind my ear, he picks up the pace, it almost feels inhuman how fast he is going and all I do is take it and welcome each and everyone of his thrust. The heat suddenly increases and it feels so dangerously good. I close my eyes and feel his seed explode inside of me.

We both are pretty breathless and start fixing our clothes. I feel him kiss my back and hug me from behind "I've missed you so much" I only smile a little still feeling a little fluster because of what we just did. "Take that Gaara, I know one thing for sure even if he tries your heart and soul will always belong to me" he says with a triumphant smile. I only stare at him but this time instead of smiling I punch him "so this was you reclaiming your territory" i start making my way away from the alley from the bar and he grabs my arm "I didn't mean it like that Sakura, you know I love you and yes I'm jealous that he asked you to marry him.. what did you expect, I wasn't thinking straight when I said that just now.. " "stop, Naruto this was a mistake. I have to go... please don't follow me" the hold on my arm only tightens "no, we have to talk about this." I see the determination in his eyes "there's nothing to talk Naruto, you're married, you're going to have a child and I'm just the mistake of your lifetime. Goodbye Lord Hokage"

As I started walking away, i had no destination in mind and some how I found myself outside of Gaara's apartment. I knocked on the door and saw him looking at me weird "I accept" he just looks at me confused again "I accept your proposal... I will marry you Gaara" he only steps aside to let me in. No words necessary, I'm pretty sure he knows what I've done, at least there's no judgment in his eyes only understanding.


	9. Chapter 9 - Survival

Hi everyone, thank you all so much for the love and follows on this story. I'm really sorry for the long wait, I got really busy with life and stuff haha. Thank you for the comments you guys really know how make a person feel special. I promise I will try to post at least once a week maybe more depending on my time.

Chapter 9 - Survival

Emptiness , that's what I feel right now. Emptiness and self-loading. I'm a horrible person, how could I do that again with Naruto, I hate being this weak. The worst part of all is that I'm dragging Gaara down with me and this isn't fair for him at all.

Yesterday I accepted Gaara's proposal but I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have seen that as my only way to get away from Naruto. I need to take responsibility for all I've done and stop running away.

"I can see you awake Sakura, you don't have to pretend to be asleep" My thoughts get interrupted by Gaara's voice, I'm not sure if I'm ready to face him yet. "Please look at me Sakura, don't hide away from me" I hear him hesitate for a moment "we need to talk about Last night" I finally decide to open my eyes and face him, I can see he is worried about me.

"Gaara... Gaara, I ..." I start crying again and feel him pull me into a tight embrace. "You need get yourself together Sakura, he is involved with someone else and it's time to move on. You are one of the strongest women alive, you will recover from this and find the happiness that you deserve" his words soothe my soul a bit and I find myself hopeful to finally move on with my life.

"I know what I must do Gaara, but I cant drag you with me. You deserve to be happy and find someone to love you unconditionally... you shouldn't settle for so little even if it's just to help a friend out" I see him giving me a smile, and I feel myself returning that warm, heartfelt smile.

"I have to get going, Naruto is going to announce his personal care team and as a jonin I need to get prepared for questioning his nominees." He only nods and lets me free from his embrace. "Perhaps, if you still need to get away I can always request you to come to my village to train my medics" I give him a small chuckle "silly man, I've already done that or did you forget" I say in a teasing manner. "Well, there's always room to improve. Don't you think?" He says with a smirk on his face. "I guess I will have to keep you posted the Lord Kazekage" I say as I walk out of the apartment only to come face to face with Naruto and Hinata.

I don't know how long I've been standing starting at them, Hinata is blushing probably assuming had just slept with Gaara. Naruto's face on the other hand, was cold and unreadable. "Well Gaara, I guess you work pretty fast to state your claim on one of my kunoichi" all I could do was stare at him getting angrier by the minute. Hinata le out a gasp shocked to about her husbands statement and rude tone. Gaara on the other hand seemed unfazed by Naruto's comment.

I was ready to hurt him and hurt him bad but I decided to take the latter instead. "Not all Hokage sama, Gaara and I were just talking and now if you all excuse me, I would like to leave and get ready for today's meeting" I answered coldly as well. Hinata sensing the tension decided to break the silence as well. "Actually, that is the reason that we came in today Gaara, Naruto wanted to invite you to the meeting along with the other Kage's." Gaara turned his gaze from Naruto and Sakura and turned to Hinata and answered "I would be an honor Mrs. Uzumaki, at what should I be at your office Naruto?"

Naruto without taking his eyes off of me answered him "10am, don't be late both of you. Please excuse us my wife and I need to go shopping for a crib for our child" with a Nod he stepped out of the doorway and let Hinata away from us, before he was to far from us he shouted "don't be late Haruno, I need you and the other jonin half an hour earlier." And with that he was gone.

Gaara and I just stood there looking at were they had stood moments ago. Haruno, he has never called me by my last name before. I guess this is for the best but I can't hide the fact that his tone hurt a little, well lets be honest here. It hurt a lot more than I'm willing to admit. Gaara touches my shoulder and that breaks my trance "that was intense, I didn't think he would react like that" I only listen to him and say nothing, there's really nothing much to say, this is the best thing that can happen let him assume the worst and also allow him time to move on and be happy with Hinata.

I turn to Gaara and give him a small kiss on the cheek "thank you for helping me out Gaara, I'm going to go now" stepping out of the apartment I start walking away from him "Sakura!" I hear him call out my name and turn to face him "lets have lunch later on I'm sure Temari would like to see you before we head out to the Sand" I only smile and and nod as a response and started heading to my place.

With every step that I take I feel the tears streaming down my face, its over now. Now I really have the opportunity to finally move on and live my life in peace.


	10. Chapter 10 - Roll Away Your Stone

Chapter 10 - Roll Away Your Stone

Trembling, that's what I was doing now. How dare him put me on the spot like that. He's so stupid thinking that I'm going to go back to him. If that's his idea than he can wait alone forever on that tower. Enough, I've had enough. I cant do this anymore, but I wont run away. I will face this and stop running. I will get over this love and finally get the closure I desperately need.

Its a good thing Kakashi stopped us from basically going at each others throats. It gives me a headache just remembering what happened. As all jonin's of the village were seated at the conference room I had found my way to Ino, who was talking to Shikamaru. She noticed me and smile and waved my way so I could take a sit next to her.

I tried to keep up with her conversation and saw Gaara making his way to the table were all the Kage were seated. I waved at him and he in returned smile nodded his head at me. "So, the kazekage huh?!" She said with a smirk on her face. I only laughed and shook my head "not at all, we are just friends pig" she only nodded at my response. All conversations died down as soon as Naruto stepped inside the room with Hinata. We all stood and vowed our heads out of respect. Following them after was Kakashi and the rest of the elders from the council and Lady Tsunade.

As the meeting progressed Naruto went through each name on his nomination list. He listed Shikamaru as strategist, Kakashi as his right hand man if something were to happen to him. Kiba as village security advisor. It wasn't surprising to see him selecting people he worked very well with. ".. and last but not least I would like to nominate Sakura Haruno as my head medic" after hearing my name I don't know what came over me, I stood up and notice that everyone's eyes were one me.

"Lord Hokage, it is an honor for you to consider me as your head Medic but I'm afraid I must decline the offer and nominate Ino Yamanaka in my stead. She is both trained in Anbu, a reliable medic and an excellent jonin. I believe she will be the best candidate for the job sir" there was only silence, no one said anything but I would see there was a storm forming in his eyes as he only glared at me furiously.

"Haruno, it is not up to you to decide who I nominate or not. You would be the obvios choice because of all the years we have worked together as genin and in team Kakashi when we were young, you are also a Sanin, you've train in anbu and are a jonin. So tell me why is it that you are unfit to be my medic?" His tone was aggressive and I could tell that he wasn't going to make things easy for me.

"It was not my intension to disrespect you in any way sir. As to why I think Ino would be a better choice is because since I was last appointed by Lady Tsunade I am already the head medic of the hospital in Konoha, aside from that, I also go on missions where I'm needed to help each and everyone of our allies. For example the kazekage today asked me to let him know when it will be best time to go check on their current program that I established when I was there a few years ago. And furthermore.." was suddenly cut off by him "whatever you and your lover do at your personal time has nothing to do with this village and before he asks anything of you for his village, he has to go through me first since you are one of my kunoichi's" Naruto snarled back.

I heard a few gasps from the people in the room, shocked by our disagreement and it only pissed me off even more. "You might be right about him asking you first officially when I'm needed in his village, but that doesn't mean that I have to accept your nomination Uzumaki. And as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted by you, Lady Tsunade made me be in charge of the progress of the medic programs from our allies sir and I would not be able to assist you if something were to happen to you"

"That's something that can be change Haruno and I can put Ino in charge of your current duties and as your Hokage acknowledge me with the respect that I deserve" I only looked at him furious beyond believe and snapped back at him "so what would be my punishment for my lack of decorum when it comes to address you sir" he only smirked and answered "A few things come to mind" i was ready to charge at him but was quickly stopped by Kakashi "calm down the both of you, it's obvious that no agreement will done today, Sakura go home and wait for further orders and as for you Naruto, you don't have to talk to her that way just because you the Hokage now"

I didn't want to hear anymore, I just open and slammed the door as I walked out of that office. I guess he really wants to show me that he's the boss and if I wanted nothing more than to end things I should get used to him treating me like this.

I was so upset I didn't hear Ino chase after me "Sakura! What the hell was that?!" I don't answer her I just keep walking, making my way to my apartment "hey! Don't ignore me forehead!" This time I stop as I hear the annoyance in her voice. "I'm sorry, I just need to get away from here. Did you hear the comments he said "a few come to mind" what the fuck was he thinking! All I wanted was to make things easier for us to avoid seeing each other." At this point I'm in tears and Ino just embraces me "did something happened?" I only nod and keep crying "when I was leaving the bar last night he chased me and we started kissing and then the usual happened. But he only did that because he thinks I accepted Gaara's marriage proposal"

Ino only listens to me and nods for me to continue "after that happened I went to Gaara's and told him yes, but this morning I woke thinking about the horrible disposition I put Gaara in so we both talked and agreed to just stay friends and that's all, he offered for me to go to his village and help out with the medics but that was all. But when I was on my way out Naruto and Hinata were on Gaara's door way and it was fucking awkward as hell" Ino rolls her eyes "so that explains why he's in a bad mood. He thinks you slept with Gaara" I just turn and start walking again "he can keep thinking that if that's what going to help me and him move on. At this point I don't care anymore"

Ino just grabbed my hand to comfort me and we walked towards my place, I knew I would have to stay there until Kakashi comes and tells me what I need to do. One thing is for certain I refuse to be his medic I will no longer let the thought him govern my mind anymore.

A couple of drinks and hours later, I hear a knock on my door. I clumsily made my way to my entry way only to be greeted by a very annoyed Kakashi. "I can see you started without me Sakura, that's not very nice" I only gave him the biggest smile and stepped aside so he could come in "so, what's my punishment" he only turned to look at me and this time with a seriously face "the elders are looking at your little combo as insubordination and want to suspend you for a month with no pay" I only stop walking and look at him in shock "they are not happy that the 2 of you had your little outburst in front of the Kage's and the jonin council. And the worst part is that now there's rumors about your relationship with Naruto and the Kazekage" I only look down in shame, I knew I deserved this but now Gaara is not involved in this too, How could I be so stupid, I ruined everything and everyone I touch. I deserve this and more.

Kakashi only lifts my face and caresses my cheek. "For now lay low, do not leave this place until Ino or I come to get you. I don't want any more scandals with you involved. This is your opportunity to finally move on and start your life with a clean slate. As for your nomination, they most certainly do not want you now, Ino is the new personal medic for the Hokage and you in the mean time as I told you before are suspended from work for a month. This is a small price to pay don't you think" I only nod "how's Gaara? Did they try to questioned him?" He nodded "he was.. well he pretty much told everyone and in very passive way to mind their own business and that whatever he does with his personal affairs has nothing to do with anyone in the council" i smile a little, I can just imagine the frustration in the elders faces while questioning Gaara and him answering them like that.

"What about Naruto, did he finally calmed down?" Kakashi suddenly looked uncomfortable "well, the elders are not happy with the way he handle the situation and told him to keep his personal issues at home and to not make a spectacle of the Hokage title... also, Hinata didn't look so good.. Sakura, just be careful ok" his seriously tone only made me uncomfortable.

As the night progressed with Ino and Kakashi trying to cheer me up, I could still hear Kakashi's words of warning. It made me feel uneasy, but little did I know that another storm was forming and it was out to destroy everything.


	11. Chapter 11 - Magnetized

So I've decided to add the songs that listen to when I write the stories

Chapter One:

Mumford and Sons "Hopeless Wanderer"

Chapter Two:

Mumford and Sons "Tompkins Square Park"

Chapter Three:

Muse "Undisclosed Desires"

Chapter Four:

Paolo Nutini "Last Request"

Chapter Five:

Amy Winehouse "Fade to Black"

Chapter Six:

Young the Giant "Cough Syrup"

Chapter Seven:

Muse "Unintended"

Chapter Eight

Local Natives "Dark Days"

Chapter Nine:

Tom Odell "Heal"

Chapter Ten

Mumford and Sons "Roll Away Your Stone"

Chapter Eleven

Tom Odell "Magnetized"

I hope you guys enjoy the story, if you have any ideas you would like me to explore, let me know :-)

Chapter 11 - Magnetized

I lay down on my bed after cleaning up my apartment, I was bored out of my mind. I don't know how long I'm going to last without going insane and the worst part I'm here for damn month. Maybe I'll ask Ino for a book or even read Kakashi's Icha Icha Paradise. I smile a little thinking about Kakashi carrying that stupid book around all the time. I close my eyes trying to relax a bit and feel my mind relaxing when the sudden knock on my door wakes me up.

As I open the door I see three faces two of the grinning and the other one more passive. I only smile at them back and step aside to let them in.

"How are you hun?" Temari asks as she hugs me hello. I only give her a small smile and return her hug "well they are not happy with my little argument with Naruto so I'm officially suspended for a month from my duties"

Kakuro only winces at my statement "I guess that would be a good punishment for a workaholic like you... ouch Temari what the hell" Kankuro rubs the spot just hit. I only laugh at this, these two are the best.

"Will the two of you knock it off" Gaara turns to them trying to get them to stop, he then turns to me "how are you feeling?" He asks in a worried tone.

I give him a small smile and head into the living room so we can all be comfortable "well, I'm as good as I'll ever be I guess" I tell him with a sad smile. "I'm more worried about you, Naruto shouldn't have said that you and I were involved that was very stupid" he only looks at me and nods

"well, I can tell you this much Sakura it sure as hell felt like there's a bit more than meets the eye when it comes to you and Naruto. Your argument seemed more like a lovers quarrel than anything else, which wouldn't matter if Naruto wasn't married." Temari says in serious tone and looks at me worried.

I look away and try to answer by I'm cut off by Gaara "it doesn't matter what her relationship is, right now what she needs to do is try to keep her distance from Naruto until he calms down"

"That's true, just let things run its natural course and I'm sure Naruto will come to his senses and apologize for the way he treated you at the meeting Sakura. I can understand why he reacted that way, you guys have been friends and comrades for so many years and you refusing to work with him must have been like a slap on the face" Kankuro tells me that as he looks at Gaara and then at me.

"You're right, I was wrong to challenge him the way I did and need to send him an official apology once I'm out of here, for now I can only stay here and think about my actions and make sure that doesn't happen again." I tell them as I start heading to the kitchen to make some tea for all of us.

"If you want to write to him now, I can always give him your letter. I need to go say goodbye before we head to our village" I stop and look at Gaara. "I'm not sure if that would be a good idea" i tell him as I pour the tea on the cups and head towards them "I'm not exactly on his good graces right now and he probably won't even read it"

"I think you might be wrong about that Sakura, I'm sure everything that happened and your suspension is killing him. Just take the first step so you can both work without tension in your everyday life's" Gaara tells me as he grabs my hand as he tries to reassure me.

I take a deep breath and head to my desk and start writing my letter. Gaara is right, Naruto is my Hokage and I should treat him with the respect that he deserves. Once I'm done, I seal my letter and give it to Gaara.

"I'm really going to miss you guys, I don't want you guys to leave" I tell the with a sad tone and look down.

Temari seeing this she hugs me "how about we all have lunch today, In your place." Turning to Gaara and Kankuro "go buy something to eat and Sakura and will set the table and wait for you two.

Kankuro only groans "Come on Temari, you only want to keep Sakura's company to yourself" he tells her accusingly. I only laugh at these two specially as I see Temari hit Kankuro on the head. Gaara just looks annoyed at those two and approaches me "is there anything in particular you want to eat Sakura?" He whispers on my ear and I'm not sure why but the proximity sends goosebumps all over my body. I only turn to face him and look at him, and tell him I want dangos and perhaps pasta. He only nods in return and steps away from me and drags Kankuro away from us.

Once they leave, I turn to Temari and head to the kitchen to get the utensils to set them at the table. As we are getting everything ready my thoughts are suddenly interrupted by Temari "Sakura? Can I ask you something?" She only whispers this to me. I turn to face her and nod in response.

"Are you and Naruto having an affair?" I stop what I was doing and stare at her "why do you ask?" This only comes out as nothing more than a mere whisper.

She comes close to me so I can look her in the eyes "because I think my brother likes you and I want to make sure your not otherwise involved" i only look at her and I feel my world crumbling and feel light headed. Temari seeing this takes me back to the living room and makes me sit down. I don't even look at her, i cant look at her. I'm so ashamed, I'm worst than scum.

"I'm in love with Naruto.." and as I told her everything that happened between me and her, I can see she's angry at my actions but doesn't say anything until I'm done, at this point I'm thinking she will leave my life and curse me to hell which I would deserve.

".. Sakura, I saw you at the alley with Naruto the other day. I was shocked to see this but I wanted to see if you were going to lie to me or not" I just look at her and wipe the tears of my face.

"I'm sorry you had to see that and I can understand if you don't want to talk to me anymore." She actually does something that shakes me to the core, she embraces me and comforts me "I can understand why you feel this way, I'm not happy that instead of being honest with Hinata you would chose to betray your friendship." I wince at her words, she's right I need to come clean and be honest with her.

"I was weak, but you're right. I need to talk to Hinata and settle this once and for all" she only nods "as for my brother, I'm glad he was trying to help you but Sakura, i'm serious when I tell you that I think he likes you and if you don't feel the same please don't string him along, after everything he has been through he deserves happiness"

I nod "I agree that he deserves to be happy and right now he is only supporting me along with Kakashi and Ino so that I can move on and leave all of this behind me" she smiles at me and takes my hand leading me to the bathroom. She helps me clean up my face so that no one can notice that I have been crying "I don't agree with the actions you have taken but I can see that you want move on, if you need anything just let me know"

Once Gaara and Kankuro came back we all enjoyed our meals and laughed about little nothings that were discussed. I looked over Gaara's way and saw him looking at me, his stare made me feel entranced for moment and then Temari's words kept ringing through my mind. Did Gaara really liked me or perhaps he was just very concerned about whatever outcome that may come in the future, either way I just want to enjoy this little peace and try to make amends for all the wrongs I've done to the people who love me.

As we all say our good byes I hug Temari really tight and she only hugs back and we smile at each other understanding that it would be a while before we see each other again. I turn to Kankuro and smack him on the head as he tells me pervy stuff while hugs me. I turn to Gaara and and hug him "thank you for everything Gaara. I'm really going to miss you" I whisper to him as a response his embrace only tightens and he caresses my hair and whispers on my ear "be safe, be strong and if things get out of hand you know where to find me" I look at him and smile. I see their forms disappear in the distance and I feel empty. I go back to my apartment and lean against the door and glance at my watch it's 8pm now, I guess I should just go wash my dishes and figure out what to do to keep myself entertained.

As I continue doing my chores, I hear a knock on the door and quickly run to open it, maybe it was Ino or Kakashi. As I open the door with a smile on my face. I find myself staring at a pair of blue eyes that only show pain and I feel myself being magnetized. I don't say anything I just continue to stare him and step aside to let him in. Little did I know that this will be the beginning of the end. We were at the end of the line and we weren't even aware of it. I should have realize that him and I were nothing more than little monsters in a shell.


	12. Chapter 12 - Let it Go

Hi guys thank you all so much for the love and support! You guys are amazing and really know how to make someone feel loved even the bad comments are funny to read I'm always up for a good laugh. Thank you for all the positive vibes and to everyone who is really getting into the story and feeling for these characters. The song inspiration for this chapter is "Let it go from James Bay"

Chapter 12 - Let it Go

It feels like we have been staring at each other forever, but neither of us is ready to break the silence. I only continue observing him, his features have change since he was kid, he's still the same loud knucklehead but he looks so much older now. My heart is beating really fast, this is the moment of truth, this is where I show what I'm made of or fall further into weakness.

"What are you doing here Lord Hokage" I say to him as nothing more than a whisper, he only continues looking my way, I can see our situation is driving him mad. "You shouldn't be here Sir, what if people start whispering that you're at another woman's place" at this he looks at me upset "will you knock it off Sakura, I'm here to talk and to settle things once and for all" I only nod in agreement "where would you like to start then sir?"

"I love you" I just stare at him as he tells me those sinful words "Naruto..." he only puts his finger on my lips softy to stop me from interrupting "I've been in love with you since I was child, when you told me you loved me that day, I was so confused and happy, but I was with Hinata and didn't want to hurt her so I let you go" he pauses for a moment "but when they made me marry her and saw you again, I lost my head and ended up hurting both of you either way" he looks down "I'm a real bastard, Hinata could have been happy with Kiba, she could have had a life of love and no one would have treated her the way I did."

My heart feels like its about to burst out of my chest, but I don't interrupt him, I just let him talk even though I feel my heart dying with each word "even if I love you, I still care about Hinata. I remember we never slept with each other on our wedding night, we both were not in the right state of mind and then I went to see you a couple of days after. I was so happy to have you on my arms, to kiss and love you the way I always dreamed. I remember one day I had returned home from a mission, and was very tired. I thought Hinata must have been sleeping, we both had at the time 2 different bedrooms, as I was going to mine there was Hinata on my bed and she told me she wanted to give our marriage a chance, apparently Kiba told her he didn't want to be her lover so he ended things with her. She looked so vulnerable that I hugged her tried to get her to feel better. I'm not even sure how we ended up kissing and we made love that night and we both made a promise to make this marriage work"

I just stare at him "you mean to tell me that you didn't have a relationship with Hinata until that night?! What the fuck Naruto, for months I was feeling like shit thinking I was betraying my friend and you fucking bastard weren't even doing anything with her?!" He only looks at me with guilt "why didn't you divorce her... why did you decide to stay with her knowing you were hurting her, Kiba and I in the process."

At this point he's standing yelling "don't you think that I know that! I feel shit, I played with everyone and it was never my intension to do so... and that night... Sakura the way I acted, the way I went after you..." I see the tears on his eyes. This situation is killing him, I can tell. Both of us are crying because of our mistakes. "Naruto, I didn't stop you, I am as guilty as you are... and I love you too but I cannot do this anymore. It's killing me, it really is. Every time I see you with her, I feel my heart breaking because she can give you something I will never be able to do and that is a family. Go back to her and fix your marriage"

"I love you so much, but I need to move on Naruto and I need to let you go. I am responsible for my actions and I apologize for damaging your life. Now she needs you more than ever Naruto, she's pregnant you're going to be a father and you have to set an example for your child." I tell him as I walk towards my window, I feel him standing behind me and puts his hand on my right shoulder "I never meant to hurt you Sakura and I wish I could take all your pain away but I can't and I cant even deny the fact that when we were together you made me so incredibly happy and our life would have been a dream come true, but as you said I need to be there for my child and like you, I'm also letting you go." I turn to face him, I just listen to his words and as much as it breaks my heart, I understand this is the final goodbye for us.

"Good luck with your family Naruto, and be honest with Hinata from now on. Be there for her and your child." I turn away from him and walk towards my door and some how I know that once I pull that door open everything will change and we will never be together again. I hear him walk towards me and feel his body heat behind me, he embraces me from behind and kisses my neck. I only close my eyes and pull my head back. As I reach for the door once more I feel him turn me around and kiss me with such passion that my will to let him go almost falters but I've made up my mind and push him away. As I open the door this time to let him out, he once again embraces and kisses me again and as we separate each other we hear a gasp.

As we both turn around we come face to face with Hinata who is looking straight at us with tears on her eyes...


	13. Chapter 13 - Her

Hey everyone,

Thanks for continuing reading the story! For those who hate it, sorry. To those who have stuck around with the story thank you so much, you are truly amazing for being open minded and giving my little story a chance. Thank you all for your comments whether they are good or bad, I really appreciate it and I'm truly grateful for your patience and waiting for my late updates.

Chapter 13 - Her

It's over, it's all over. Here she is standing on my doorway looking at us shocked and with tears on her eyes. What do I do? What should I say? I try to move my lips but no words are coming out.

Everything was out in the open now, and the moment of confrontation is finally here. I lower my gaze and take a deep breath, we will settle this now with no turning back. "Hinat..." I feel a pain on my cheek, it takes me a few minutes to realize what just happened. The next thing I know I'm facing Naruto's back shielding me from Hinata. Everything is just a blur, what have a I done. I'm trying to organize my thoughts and say something, but it's not working. God dammit say something! Anything! She deserves to know the truth.

I'm pulled out of inner thoughts at the mention of Naruto's name, at this point I see people looking out their windows whispering and judging. I turn my gaze back to Naruto and Hinata and I see her slapping Naruto, this action shakes me to the core, it's not his fault. I should be the one getting punished. I slightly push Naruto back until I'm face to face with Hinata. "It's not his fault Hinata... its mine" she only looks more enrage to see me try to defend him. "It's true, before I left on my trip I told Naruto that I had feelings for him and he rejected me. I tried Hinata, I tried so hard to keep my distance from him but something kept pulling me back and I'm sorry for that, I'm sorry for hurting you, I'm sorry for betraying your trust and above all our friendship. Hit me, fight me but leave him alone. He acted on impulse but in the end it was I who in many ways got in the way of the two of you achieving happiness and for that I apologize"

As I finish talking Hinata looses her balance and falls to the ground, Naruto quickly picks her up and takes her inside my apartment. She's just crying, and quickly pushes Naruto away from her as he tries to sit next to her on the couch. "How could you! Naruto, we're having a baby! You promised me that you would be loyal even if she was here. You promised me to give us a chance! I have done everything in my power to make you love me and just to find out that it was worthless. That no matter what, I will always be her shadow." She points a finger at me "I can't keep fighting a useless battle, I can't keep fighting for a hopeless future. I love you Naruto, I always have. But my heart can't take so much disappointment" she tells Naruto as she looks at her hands, Naruto kneels in front of her and takes her hands, she quickly moves away "Hinata, I do love you and I'm sorry that I hurt you. I tried my best to forget Sakura, I tried my best burry these feelings that drive me insane. I didn't just hurt you Hinata, i hurt her as well. I should have been honest with the two of you. When we got married you were so unhappy to have to marry me when you were already settled with Kiba and because of my dream I got in the way of your happiness then and now because of my selfishness I destroyed your happiness again."

"Unfortunately Naruto the time for words is over, you shod have been honest with me from the very beginning and you Sakura" somehow I feel like she's looking through my soul "you should have stayed away from our lives. We are a family and soon we will be mother and father, this new responsibility should have kept you at bay, but no you chose the latter instead. I want you to stay away from my family Sakura or I will kill you and that my former friend is a promise of a life time" I just look at her, who was this person. Hinata was many things but never harsh or intimidating. I can see now that harsh times really do change person. " I understand Hinata, I will not be in your way. I promise to show you that I'm truly sorry for what I have done." "I don't care about your empty promises Haruno, if you ever come between my happiness and the happiness of my growing family do not hesitate to believe that I will kill you. Unlike you I'm not a dishonest person and would never harm someone just for the hell of it, but you have been warned now. If I see you alone with my husband be ready for the consequences" I don't say anything back, this is a woman ready to fight to save her family and deserves nothing but respect so I just nod my head in approval. Actions speak better than words and as such I shall now stay away from one of the most important people in my life, the man that has saved my life time and time again, this is a punishment is well deserved.

Naruto just looks at me, I can see the sadness in his eyes, a silent goodbye perhaps. At this point who knows. I see them both start heading towards the door Naruto tries to help her out the door but she just pushes him away. I head towards them ready to give up on everything to literally close the door on this nightmare. The judge has read the verdict, I know my punishment now and I must live with the regret of destroying a family for the rest of my life.


	14. Chapter 14 - Cough Syrup

Hey guys, as promised here is the new chapter for HIM. Thank you for all your comments trust me when I tell you that I will keep them in mind. I know this topic is very sensitive and as a victim of being cheated on as well I know the feeling but I still wanted to write something different. Please see below for the list of songs that inspire this chapter. Also, please leave a comments for they inspire me to keep writing. Thank you so much and love you all and see you all next Friday!

List of Songs:

Cough Syrup - Young the Giant

Ready to Change - Kodaline

Oblivion - Bastille

Like Gold - Van Joy

All I Want - Kodaline

Shake it Out - Florence and the Machine

Dog Days are Over - Florence and the Machine

Chapter 14 - Cough Syrup

I close my eyes and try to feel the wind on my face, somehow sitting on top of the Hokage faces brings some sort of comfort to me. Perhaps it's because the face of my beloved mentor was carbed here, or perhaps because his face was now at display as well. I can't remember the last time I felt his lips on mine, his hands touching every part of my body. I would be lying to myself if I said that I do not miss him. It has been a year since that fateful day with Hinata. Everything that I have ever held dear was taken away from me, and it was very well deserved.

He was officially a father of a beautiful baby boy named Boruto. Ino tells me that he tries to see his son as much as possible or at least as much as Hinata allows him. Since that day, Hinata moved back to the Hyuga compound and decided to separate from Naruto. They were still legally married but she didn't want him anywhere near her, she was disgusted by what she had seen at my house that fateful night. Naruto was now living somewhere else and anyone barely saw him unless it was with that big goofy smile of his whenever he was out with his son.

As for me, well things are not going so well. Many people in the town whisper about my affair with the Hokage and even look at me with disloyalty. I've lost many friends because of what I did and I deserve every bit of it. I did this to myself and I should at least take the punishment without complains. I guess it will take a long time before I have the trust of the people around me again. At least I have Ino and Kakashi, so I guess I'm not completely alone. I just wish that I could see him at least one more time, just as friends and nothing else. I have been true to my word to Hinata, I stayed away from Naruto as much as I could, if they needed something from the Hospital my assistant Clau will go in my stead and report to the Hokage.

At the end of the day I knew very well that I would not be able to keep interacting this way. I was in charge of the hospital and I travel to Suna to keep an eye on the training that I had started there a few years ago at Gaara's request. Thinking about Gaara always puts a smile on my face, he was such a great friend and confident. He knew of the situation between Naruto, Hinata and I and understand why I would take trips to Suna so that I could get away from all that animosity.

As I made my way down the monument heads and started walking down at the busy streets of Konoha, I could hear whispers around every time the citizens saw me walking around. It makes want to scream and apologize to the world for all my crimes but I know at the end of the day I will always be the other woman who destroyed the home of the Princess of the Hyuga's and the much admired Hokage. I will always be a home wrecker and a vile dishonest person, no matter what I did.

I pass through a dango shop and saw Ino there with Shikamaru laughing and having fun. I waved hi to her and she waved back asking for me to join them. As I made my way in, the atmosphere changed a bit. As I got closer to Ino's table I saw that she was around other people from the rookie 9. All of them seamed to nod my way but I could feel that I was not welcome to sit with them. I grabbed a chair and sat next to Ino, she squeeze my hand from under the table, I guess she could feel the tension on the table. They all continue talking but I could feel someone's eyes on me, I knew very well who it was and I knew the confrontation will have to happen eventually.

"You know it's quite devious of you to come and sit with us after what you did to Hinata, I guess being a slut is a bit of an accomplishment for you, eh Sakura" everyone on the table stayed quiet for a few minutes before Ino started talking "Kiba, what..." I stopped her and instead I directed my attention to Kiba "please finish what you wanted to say Kiba no one will interrupt you" he just snarled at my calm response. "There isn't much to say, but after everything we've been through, how could you do this to her. She was your friend and admired you, but you... you decide to pay your friendship by sleeping with her husband? I just don't understand you. After they got married, it broke me apart but I knew that she was still in love with Naruto and so did you! So why would you be so weak and pathetic and give into your lust." I just stare at him, I can feel the tears building up in my eyes but I just continue to listen to him. "Her marriage is broken, she's raicing her kid on her own, even though she hates Naruto for what he did, I know she will forgive him eventually. Naruto has always been a bit of a idiot when it comes to you. He's always dropped everything to come to your aid and this time was no different. So tell me Sakura-Chan, what did you tell Naruto to make him cheat on his wife with someone like you?"

"That's enough Kiba" all of us turn to face Hinata, she look beautiful and graceful, motherhood has definitely made her glow and happy "I will not have one of my teammates treat a Comrade like that, even if it is Haruno-San. Whatever happened between my husband, her and I had nothing to do with anyone else. We've already discussed things and rather not get into details. So please stop this nonsense" this is the second time I hear Hinata be so strong willed, I guess after being with Naruto helped her built up her confidence. Everyone on the table were shocked to see Hinata let alone defending her of all things. She turned to face me and gave me a small smile and sat down next to Kiba to calm him down.

Shikamaru stretched and finally spoke "I think you should leave Sakura, things are getting a bit uncomfortable specially for you, I think it will be best if you just left" Ino turned to him ready to protest but I couldn't help but to agree with Shikamaru. I had to leave, and this time for a very long time. It was more than obvious that I will never be forgiven, not by my friends and they were right not to do so. So I made my way out of the Dango shop and made my way to house and started packing. I wrote letters to Ino, Kakashi and one for him letting him know that I need to leave and that I was not deserting the village in case he sent Anbu after me.

I covered my furniture and packed up the necessary and I walked out of my house ready to move on from this place that once held so many good memories of a time when I was happy. As I get the gates, I turn to look at the Hokage monuments and my eyes linger on his face, I will miss him but this was for the best for everyone and best for me even if that makes me selfish. It's time for me to move on with my life and leave all thoughts of Konoha in the past were they belong.

With that we are done with part 1 of the story. I'm puting on hold Sakura's Point of View, in the next chapter I want review the point of those in the village once they notice Sakura left and Naruto's reaction as well as Hinata's. After that we will continue to see what she has been up to.


	15. Chapter 15 - After the Storm

Chapter 15 - After the Storm

Hello Guys!

I freaking love all of you! Thank you so much for the people who commented on the story, liked and followed it! You guys are my inspiration so thank you so much for reading this.

She's gone, I can't believe it. I know I shouldn't be feeling the way I am but I can't help it. I love her, dammit! I can't believe that after all these years she still has an incomprehensible hold of my heart, body and soul. I'm so stupid to think that after we ended our affair that things will eventually go back to normal between the two of us. But after the scandal, Sakura because ostracize from our group and some of the villagers.

I know I should have done something about it but Hinata gave me an ultimatum and even after I gave Sakura up the damage I had inflicted Hinata was too deep for her to forgive me. I know I deserve her hate, when you really think about it my actions were the ones that led for my family and Sakura's life to be destroyed. But if I'm completely honest with myself feeling Sakura in my arms, having my hands wonder around her body memorizing every angle was defiantly worth it.

I knew Hinata was aware of my undying love for Sakura but we still decided to give each other a chance and I still wasn't able to give Sakura up, not after her confession, not after my lips touch hers, not even when we first lay with one another. I will never forget the way she trembled when I touch her body. Every time I close my eyes I see her smiling at me for no reason. It makes my heart ache knowing that once I wake she won't be there for me to kiss, hug or love. I don't deserve her, I don't deserve anything. I'm a terrible husband and a terrible friend.

It makes shudder just remembering Ino's words and the way she looked at me when she handed me the letter. I've always been treated like trash and that day was the first time I actually felt like the scum of the earth. I didn't just loose my family, I lost my best friend. I pushed her away and let her take the blame for actions that were mad by the two of us. At the end of the day I was a coward and I don't even deserve to think about her anymore.

A knock on my door interrupts my thoughts, as I turn around, I come face to face with Hinata and Boruto "Naruto, how are you?" She asks with a small smile on her pretty face. She truly is a beauty, I just wish I was able to give her what she wanted from me all those years. I give her a small smile "alright, how are you? Is everything alright with Boruto?" She shakes her head yes and moves closer to me. This time I see she looks a bit worried "Naruto, I heard about Sakura leaving the village. Did she talk to you about it?" I only shake my head no, I can't talk about Sakura, specially not to her. "Perhaps you can go after her if it hurts you that much that she is gone" She offers "if she wanted me to follow her, she would have come to me first so that I can change her mind. Plus I think I hurt her enough in this life to keep getting in the way of her finding happiness. Don't you think?"

"Naruto, I feel... I feel responsible for her leaving the village. Everyone talked behind her back, even Kiba confronted her but I told him to stop. I hate seeing you this sad Naruto. But perhaps it's time for you to move on as well. It's been 5 months since she left and you still have that letter she left you." I can't face her, I only look out the window, I know she means well but it still what she is saying to me makes my heart ache even more. I know that I should move on but I can't. I just can't.

"Hinata you are not responsible for anything, in fact you were a victim of my indiscretions and I'm really sorry that I failed to make you happy the way you always wanted." She only gives me a sad smile. "I hated you, I hated you for a while. But I hated her more because she knew of my feelings towards you and she still approached you. She stole you from me without even trying and it just hurt to see how I was loosing you to her. I'm not stupid Naruto, I knew you were seeing her, but when I saw you kissing that day. You broke my heart, you broke my life and I hated you for it. I hated the two of you for playing with my feelings and my life like that." She reaches out and hugs me really tight and caresses my hair in a very soothing way. "She left to give you a chance to reconcile with the village to try to gain their trust once more. Don't disappoint her by being secluded and not smiling. Give yourself a chance to be happy again Naruto. Go on a date, see other people and if she is really who you want then go and bring her back. But don't quit before you even try."

As I pull away, I actually give her a smile and nod in agreement. This was my chance to see who I really am without Sakura in my life, without the shadow of my love for her. Hinata was right, I need to move on or at least I need to give it a try. As we both say our goodbyes, I kiss my sleeping son on his forehead and realize that I am not completely broken. I have my son who is the light of my life and my reason for living. I will not disappoint him and I will make him proud to have me as a father. As they leave I look at Sakura's letter one more time and start reading it before putting it away for good.

 _"_ _My Dearest Naruto,_

 _I want to tell you so many things, I want to run to you and tell you that I love you and your silly smile. I miss having you around and joking around, but what I miss the most is the fact that I lost my best friend because of what we did. I love you so much and if you still feel the same about me than you will understand why I'm choosing to leave our home for a while._

 _I wish I could tell you this in person but I know, I'm weak and I will not be able to face you and tell you all of this. I know that if you were to ask me to stay I probably would. I feel so dirty and I need to find a way to forgive myself for my actions that had led us to heart break. I need time to find out who I really am and while I'm away I wish for you to also move on if you haven't already._

 _Please don't look for me, don't go into sage mode to see if I'm alright. We need to move on and start over. But before we do all that I just wanted to say I love you with all my heart and I don't regret the time I spend with you, but I do regret the way we did it. I made you cheat on your wife and let's be honest, we probably would have continued with our affair if it wasn't for Hinata getting pregnant._

 _I will miss you with all my heart but I need to do this, I need to be away from everything and everyone for now._

 _I love you Naruto and I hope you understand._

 _Sakura. "_

Tears start falling down my face but this time I'm ready to redeem myself and I'm ready to make her proud. I fold the letter and put it away, it's time to start acting like the Hokage and not like love sick puppy.

Prepare yourselves citizens of Konoha because Naruto Uzumaki is coming your way, believe it!

And that's all for now, sorry for taking too long to update guys, I've been crazy busy!

Anyway please follow and comment for they are my inspiration to continue writing!

Love you all!

M


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